ROSS TAYLOR

photo stories: a love, complimented

Tom Rogenski, 64, and Theresa Delzatto, 43, are a disabled couple who live together in New Horizons Village in Unionville, Connecticut. Rogenski is blind, and Delzatto has severe cerebral palsy. Their abilities are complimentary, however, as she can see where he cannot, he can move where she cannot. 

The two met at New Horizons (which is an assisted living facility) and began dating just over a year. This story documents their relationship and courtship, and follows them through their wedding and honeymoon.  

  • Tom and Theresa Rogenski cuddle with each other on Christmas night in 2006. Theresa is holding a {quote}Baby Alive' doll which Tom gave her for a Christmas gift. The two are unable to have a child through a natural pregnancy and have thought about adoption as an option, as they desire to have a child in their new family. The couple didn't share a bed together before their wedding, so each night they would gather like this for a cuddling session to end the day. Tom and Theresa called their cuddling {quote}hiding.{quote}  {quote}That's when he makes me feel the safest, when we're 'hiding',{quote} said Theresa.
  • Tom and Theresa Rogenski cross the bridge on Main Street over the Farmington River. The two sometimes opt to travel in the roadway instead of the sidewalks due to the breaks in the sidewalk which can be problematic to negotiate in Theresa's wheelchair. The couple was traveling on this day to Unionville center to tend to some shopping and banking. The scene looks precarious, but with Theresa watching for traffic, they make it safely. “If you say we can’t make it, we won’t,” says Tom. “If you say we can, we will. Not without its hardships, but we will.”
  • Theresa Rogenski chuckles at Tom while he kicks back on a bed for sale at The Big E this past fall after a long day walking behind Theresa. At age 64, it can be exhausting for Tom to be on his feet for hours at a time, but as long as he's behind Theresa, he doesn't seem to mind. “Some people make a big deal about the age difference between us,” says Tom. “But we don't give two hoots about age. Age is just a number.”
  • Tom and Theresa pause in a moment together during a trip to Wal-Mart. “Some people look at us and they say, ‘Wow, they’ll never make it.’ We have our critics, but we both know we must look beyond them and go on with our lives,” says Tom. “Two people with separate disabilities requires an enormous amount of patience. And we have it for each other. Every facet of life is a challenge. But are you willing to accept it? That's a question everyone has to be willing to ask themselves.”
  • Tom and Theresa head out for a walk while a father and his son pass by on a neighborhood walk. The couple often draw stares while out in public.
  • Amanda Mastropietro, a personal care attendant from Bristol, feeds Theresa Rogenski her dinner  while Tom eats by her side. While the couple live by in large without assistance, they do rely on daily visits from PCA's to help with some activities. Tom often spends time by Theresa's bed just to be close to her, since she is unable to move without assistance.
  • Tom leans over to give Theresa a big smooch during a village-wide Christmas dinner celebration in New Horizon's Great Hall.
  • The two speak together at the {quote}Big E{quote} festival about a cell phone plan while at Verizon's employee waits patiently at their side.
  • Tom holds Theresa's hand late one night as he sits by her bedside. Tom faithfully sits by her side almost every night.
  • Pastor Susan Nagle greets Theresa and Tom after church at Gloria Dei Lutheran Church in Bristol. The two often attend church together at Gloria Dei.
  • Tom falls asleep late one evening with the {quote}Baby Alive{quote} doll in his lap. He was holding it until he went in to visit with Theresa to tell her goodnight.
  • The happy couple share a quiet moment together during a wedding shower at New Horizons.
  • Tom reacts with excitement as he gets fitted for his tuxedo at Oscar's Formal Wear not long before the wedding day.
  • Theresa gets ready for the big day with the help of family and friends in her apartment at New Horizons Village. Her mother, Nora, second from the right, beams with excitement.
  •  Theresa Rogenski waits in her apartment with her bridesmaids Wanda Schmitt and Barbara Pedenski before her wedding.
  • The van doors open and the lift lowers the bride to the ground, just outside the reception hall in New Horizons Village. Her groom waits patiently in the dusk of the evening, arms raised in anticipation. A small crowd of waiting guests has gathered to welcome them at the Great Hall at New Horizons Village. “Sometimes, we disabled people build up our own walls,” says Tom. “But I can't. And I won't.”
  • Tom and Theresa lock in an embrace near the end of their wedding reception at New Horizons Village. Exhaustion and relief overcome them after the long, emotional day. “I can’t tell you how happy I was when I met Tom, because I knew it was the end of a search I had started so many years ago.”
  • To hoots and applause, the newly announced Mr. and Mrs. Rogenski shuffle into the Great Hall at New Horizons and bask in their moment before sharing their first dance as husband and wife. The pair have practiced for months, swaying and singing to one another as Tom rounds the chair with his rhythmic steps. They choose Ann Murray’s “Could I Have This Dance (For The Rest Of My Life)?” because, as Tom says, “We’re partners for life.”
  • It's time for the festivities to end as a helper cleans up the reception area before guiding Tom and Theresa out of the reception.
  • After all the excitement of the wedding, the couple make their way back alone to their apartment up the street from the reception.
  • Tom and Theresa sit in their honeymoon suite at Mohegan Sun, quietly waiting for the moment they’ll share a bed together for the first time. They wait for Becky Clarke, their personal care attendant, who has come to help Theresa into the bed with a special metal lift. “[The honeymoon] was our getaway from the cares, from New Horizons, from the worry of shopping and…planning anything,” says Tom. “We were just living it up, really. And to do it together was just awesome.”
  • Becky Clark prepares the {quote}honeymoon{quote} bed for Tom and Theresa as they lay together for the first time. Clark is one of the personal care attendants for the couple.
  • Tom and Theresa cuddle as they share a bed for the first time on their honeymoon night at Mohegan Sun. While they moved in with each other about two years ago, they chose to keep separate bedrooms until they wed, out of respect for their religious beliefs and each other. They lay in their honeymoon bed, whispering and playing footsies – sharing a physical contact they had never had before.  “It was a big night for both of us. It started the beginning of our relationship for real,’ says Theresa. “Having his arms around me for the first time, realizing that he never had to let go. He could stay there for the entire night. It was a miracle.”
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